Posted on September 30, 2013 · Posted in Blog

It’s painful, it’s costly and it’s not worth it.

Divorce Courtroom

A few years ago I went through a painful, drag ‘em out, courtroom divorce and I came to this conclusion, there has to be a better way to handle marital break down than taking a contract out on your ex.

Divorce throws a big monkey wrench into your life. It requires you to continue living while untangling your emotions and figuring out what your next steps will be. And then there’s the money. I learned that if you want to keep your hard earned cash in your pocket, stay out of court!

Here’s an example of how to look at divorce and hanging on to your money. Let’s say you have 10 apples. These 10 apples symbolize all the matrimonial property that you and your spouse accumulated during your relationship. You have a big decision to make – how many of those apples are you willing to spend on your lawyer? Remember that each time you meet, email, or call, it’s cha-ching! And quite often if you end up in court, you don’t have enough apples left to take even a small bite!

If you use the services of your lawyer to torture your soon-to-be ex-spouse, you are going to have far less cash in your pockets to begin your new journey. So, I’ll say it again, STAY OUT OF COURT!

Canadian Lawyer MagazineCanadianLawyerMag.com recently surveyed over 500 lawyers, and for a contested divorce the costs ranged from $6,582 to $86,644 with an average of $15,570.  Click HERE for the survey. In comparison, an uncontested divorce will cost around $1,000 and if you need a professional’s help in dividing your stuff, it will be more. Heaven forbid but if you should end up needing a judge to make the final decision, your costs will increase exponentially and you probably won’t be satisfied with the judge’s decision.

If you can find a way to put your emotions in check, your divorce is going to cost a lot less! On the other side of the coin, if you let your emotions rule your decision-making process, you’ll not only regret it but you’ll also be much poorer. Divorce is a transition, not a life style and the emotional crap is temporary, however, the legal costs are permanent.

A great way to stay out of court is to use divorce mediation. Mediators can help you focus on the important stuff, which in turn reduces the financial costs and the emotional trauma. Keep that in mind should you ever find yourself on the doorstep of divorce.
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divorce mediation kelownaAbout Kelowna Divorce Mediation Services

We are not expensive lawyers; we are family divorce mediators and rebuilding coaches.  Our boutique divorce mediation firm has become Kelowna’s first choice when dealing with separation and divorce, and beyond. It is possible to reduce stress, time and conflict. Our mediation and rebuilding models educate and empower our clients, so that when you leave you have a document that is guaranteed to stand the test of time, and a process for rebuilding your life.

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